2 Mar 2012

I’m having a hard time figuring out how to take care of myself and my friends at the same time! Sometimes it’s all I can do to get to a comfortable, clear place- then suddenly a friend or coworker bombards me with venting or gossip. I understand that as a friend I should be available to my friends, and that they want to share with me. On the other hand- I don’t like having negativity dropped onto me, unasked. Any help is greatly appreciated! I’m having a hard time figuring out how to take care of myself and my friends at the same time! Sometimes it’s all I can do to get to a comfortable, clear place- then suddenly a friend or coworker bombards me with venting or gossip. I understand that as a friend I should be available to my friends, and that they want to share with me. On the other hand- I don’t like having negativity dropped onto me, unasked. Any help is greatly appreciated!

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Posted in: Friends

These situations are tricky for sure!  I think it is great awareness that you have this so well analyzed.  Most of us just go through life riding the rollercoaster without ever understanding the energetic exchanges occurring between friends, coworkers, partners, kids, etc.  I have a few suggestions that may help…

 

  1. When you have control over whether you answer the phone or text, check in first with yourself, and make sure you feel like chatting.  This one is so simple, but honestly I only just realized that I have that kind of control.  It has been very helpful.
  2. Before you get to work, on your way there, create a clear feeling that you want for the day.  Hold that intention for a few minutes and be sure to focus on the feeling.  For example, if you are in a tough place before work even begins, imagine a feeling of relief.  Maybe the person whom usually bombards you with their own drama, is the one who helps you today.
  3. It is very challenging to hold a space for someone without getting sucked into their experience.  Especially if that person is someone you care for.  We do ourselves and them a huge favor by holding them in a high vibration of what their true essence is, and not getting bogged down with them.  They actually need all of their own energy to come full circle and heal.  So, maybe offer a hug or some words of encouragement and leave it at that.
  4. Be vocal about what you are able to handle in that moment.  Express encouragement or love and then remove yourself from the situation.  Even the best of friends can’t always be there for each other in every moment.  This may take some practicing as it is always awkward establishing new behaviors.
  5. When you are feeling rough, play with the energy that defines your space.  Create a clear bubble around yourself, make sure it is without any holes or blemishes, and that it resonates only for you.  Release energy that is not yours.  Sit in your space that is solely yours and no one else’s and create a connection between you and your higher self.  Remain in that space as long as you need.  It will be very healing.

 

I hope one or some of these tips help.  Good luck!

Cheers,
Thanks for having Tea with Tyler

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